When you walk into Karen’s Diner, you might be fooled by the charming 50’s diner decor, but leave all expectations of hospitality at the door. You’re more likely to be greeted with a ‘What do you want’ than a ‘Welcome’, and if you get in the way, it’ll be ‘MOVE!’ rather than ‘Excuse me’.

Robin Clarke, VETTING.com’s CRO, recently spent an evening at their Manchester location. Under his waitress’ icy glare, he panic-ordered a milkshake to accompany the spicy wings. While delicious, the wings turned out to be mild compared to the third degree burns his ego suffered.

With short, asymmetrical haircuts and wits as sharp as their tone, the waitstaff (also known as ‘Karens’) unleash on hapless customers with biting insults and chaotic entitlement. In order to survive, we recommend ordering some liquid courage in the form of a cocktail or shooter – perhaps the ‘Are You Taking the Piss?’ or the ‘I’ve Been Waiting 10 Minutes for Service’.

If your name is really Karen, you’ll get yours for free!

In the aftermath, Robin said, “I was only expecting my burger to be grilled – not me! My poor friend’s vegan status was announced to the entire place via megaphone, triggering a resounding chorus of boos from the staff and other diners! I knew then and there we absolutely had to help them improve how they vetted their employees!”.

As a result, VETTING.com has partnered with Karen’s Diner to streamline their screening, and it’s been working overtime checking new team members! The hope is the quick turnaround of Digital Reference Checks within 24hrs will enable Karen’s Diner to find some sweeter employees – ideally with no verbal assault record. 

VETTING.com’s Chief Technology Officer, Paul Wood, dabbed sweat from his forehead as he reported, “The system is under the pump, but we’re committed to the mission!”

However, we spoke to some current Karen’s employees about VETTING.com, and they seemed to think the screening was for something else…

Karen #192 from Sydney CBD location told us, “We f**kin’ love it! We’ve been able to tweak the Reference templates to make sure all our Karens will deliver the rudest possible service and the most entertaining clap-backs. You’ve got to be rough as guts to be a f**kin’ Karen – that’s what we’re screening for.”

They’ve dubbed the Right to Work check the ‘Right to Riot’, and reimagined DBS Checks to be the ‘Dangerous Bitch Scan’.

The results of this background screening remain to be seen, so a word of advice to those visiting a Karen’s Diner in the meantime…

For the love of Karen, enjoy the food, but do not ask to speak to the manager!

Written by Mary Snowden.